Thursday, July 23, 2009

Awkward Social Media Moment: My Un-Friend

Facebook suggested a friend for me today, complete with picture of a colleague. Furrowing my brow, I thought it weird as we're already Facebook Friends. OR SO I THOUGHT. Checked my Friends list: Gone. This could mean: Un-Friended! So then comes the awkward social media moment:

1. Do I send a Facebook message and ask what's up with this directly?
2. Do I just glare at him from afar at conferences knowing he's a new Un-Friend?
3. Do I pull a grade-school move and have someone snoop around about it?
4. Should I introduce him as my UFF (Un-Friend Forever) at business events? You know, the social media version of having an "Ex".

My daughter who was forced to listen to my Facebook tale of woe tells me she's been re-friended because friends have had their sites hacked and then needed to start all over again. So maybe that's it.

I recently read an article about how "painful" the Facebook "Friend Suggestions" can be as they sometimes pull up the last person someone wants to see - like a stalker, or the person who broke up their marriage, or someone they seriously dislike. And there are surely people on any given list who you wouldn't mind Un-Friending you (at all) ...

Does social media now create new awkward relationships? Should I print out the list of my Facebook Friends so I can start sadly drawing red X's through their pictures if they leave me? [Note: I don't think the Un-Friend thing should matter at all if you don't actually know the "Friend" in real life.]

So, for those who keep me, thanks so much for being my Friend. I'd notice if you were gone.


Monika said...

That happened to me. It was my sisters brother in law. I still don't know why but I suspect I was just too active an updater for him. Funny thing is I bet he has no clue that I know or if he does he simply doesn't care.
When I next see him I will offhandedly make a comment about being unfriended by him. It's not a big deal but I will mention it.
I would make a joke of it but I would mention it to your unfriender too. If only to make you feel better... lol let him know you know.

jkhewett said...

People "unfriend" for many reasons. I recently had one "inform" me of this as he loved working with me but was a very private person and didn't want to share the "other" side of his life. Work/Home separation issues.

There are so many who want to be friends ... it's a waste to spend anytime on those who don't.

As for the "awkward" how would you handle it if they got on an elevator with you? or walked down the aisle at the grocery store? Just smile and move on, knowing you have so many who love and support you and WANT to be connected to you and they are missing out! :-)

Anonymous said...

My own cousin actually unfriended me once - thanks to my Twitter feed. I had already decided that the two should not meet and cancelled the application. I wrote to reassure her that her wall would not be filled with my posts any longer :-). Unless you are a once-in-a-blue-moon Twitterer, it's probably best not to have your tweets appear on your FB page ...